Exactly 25 years ago this morning the greatest thing that I have contributed or will contribute to this earth came to be when I was in the delivery room for the miracle of birth with my daughter;  a baby that would become the lady, Stacey Sledd.

You may notice that she has a different name than me.  You see, I played the role of biological dad in this story, but not really father.  That honor was passed via adoption to Dave Sledd, and he has worn it so much better than I could have.  Dave is the best father that I could wish on any little girl, and I’m proud to have him with this one.

I’m proud of who Stacey is.

I’m proud of who she is becoming.

I’m proud in so many ways I could explode.

I always knew that she was out there, and there were many times in my life (including the time of her birth) that I was too selfish, and stupid to make time in my mind or heart for her.

To my great loss.

She’s told me that it’s very rare for adopted children to find their biological parents at all much less to have a happy, positive relationship.

It’s the great blessing of my life to have met her at all, but to love her, and be loved by her, and to be embraced by her (and now my extended) family.  It’s the second miracle of our lives with Stacey to have been welcomed into this life that all the Kinnisons missed.

This is truly a great day of celebration.  It is we who celebrate receiving the gift.

Happy Birthday, Kid.  I love you.

Dad 2.0

Center Stage.  CBC High School Theater, St. Louis.  1984.

Yep. Abject panic…and the second scariest day that week (more on that in a minute). My palms are sweating even as I start to type this a few (honestly many) years later.

One Sunday, after hockey practice, a few of us super macho, tough, manly hockey dudes were pulling back into the parking lot of our high school where we’d left our cars to pool up and get to the rink.  We were joking, laughing, belching, and generally carrying on as hockey dudes do, and smelling like, well, teenage hockey dudes…and we noticed that there were theater auditions going on for the winter musical.

Our amazing powers of perception were alerted when we saw actual girls walking into our (all-boys) high school.  On a Sunday.

We instantly became thespians.

We went into the theater, and sat in the back, trying to make time with the girls, and making fun of the guys who were auditioning.  All in good fun.  Until the theater director, Tom Murray (a mentor, friend, and mensch) told us we had to audition, or get out.

The Road Runner would have been proud of what happened next.  The hockey dudes were like the grease in the bowl of Dawn dishwashing liquid.  Gone.  Repelled.  Vapor.

It was down to me, and Kevin Quirk…and we decided that we’d stay, and do it as a lark.  (But really just to meet the chicks).

…and then there’s the moment where it’s your turn.  You watch the names on the list, one by one, going by until there are only two places to run.  Out the rear theater door to embarrassment, shame, humiliation, mocking (and no chicks’ phone numbers) or to the center of the stage where there’s embarrassment, shame, humiliation, mocking (and no chicks’ phone numbers).

Getting to the middle of the stage was hard enough on rubber legs, but then the spotlight hits you.  And the piano starts the song you’re going to sing.

Fade to black.

…and as I said, that’s the second most terrifying day of that week.

The next morning, I arrived at school, and all through the halls, dudes (hockey and otherwise) are congratulating me.  ”Thanks…but for what???!!”, I said over and over.

“You got the lead in the play.”

Whether or not you’re a fan of pros playing in the Olympics, the Russian hockey team lacing them up in a few weeks is just scary. Ovechkin, Malkin, and Kovalchuk as the first PP unit. EEK.

For a long time, I’ve wondered (been frustrated with) why I still have a ‘marvelous middle’ for all of the cycling that I do. Of course, I wish I rode more, but there is that whole job…starting a business…maintaining a relationship thing.

I could never put the math together in a way that made sense for my calories in, calories out. It ALWAYS seemed like I was in a deficit that should have led to some belly being shed….but I still have that extra ‘warmth’.

About two months ago, I read an article that sparked an interest in my metabolism as a potential cause.

I’ve done the VO2MAX test a few times when I raced to figure out what my body was burning at higher intensities, but never how efficient my body was at using fat as an energy source throughout the intensity spectrum.

The article (really…you should read it!!) mentioned that there were testing centers all over the place that offer this exercise metabolism test.

Google here I come….

In DFW the first I came across (and best, I have no doubt) is Metabolic Wellness. Angie Katz, and a partner (who’s name is Michelle, I think) offer the services at the Willow Bend Athletic Club in Plano.

It’s a test that takes about 90 minutes, and you can do it on your bike…a spinning bike…or the treadmill. It’s not measuring your VO2Max, so it’s not too stressful, and it will kick out a fascinating chart of data about your body’s use of carbs, and fat as energy when you’re working out.

It does turn out that my body is addicted to carbs while I’m exercising, and that I’ve been going too hard to let the fat kick in an energy source. Angie established a training plan to help my body get better at using fat, and her computer kicks out a really easy to read, handy chart:
…that gives hard numbers to my suppositions.

Plus, she’s a really cool lady. Completely understanding, knowledgeable, and non-threatening. I can’t think of this being a better experience. She’s a cyclist too, who’s spending some time off the bike b/c of injury.

The prescription is to be riding S-L-L-L-L-O-O-O-O-W-W-W a few times a week to kick-start the fat burning. I’ve always tried to go slow in the off season, but alas, never slow enough.

If you’re a rider in North Dallas, keep your eyes peeled for an iceberg (slow moving white object) on a Blue Cannondale. You’ll blow by me while I’m trying to shrink.

…and if you’ve always wondered why there was always more of you to love….get a hold of Angie. Best $215 I’ve spent on my health in years.

You just never know what you’re starting….and how many people there are out there that are waiting for a reason to belong to something. (spoken by a person who’s been waiting for a reason to belong to something)

As far as I can tell…asking people to join in only works if you’re not a goober.

Suzanne is not a goober. And she’s quite a wordsmith, so she probably doesn’t use words like, well……

…Goober.

I can’t believe I resisted becoming a part of the social media conversation for so long. It feels good to connect with people, and to belong to something(s) generous.

What a great story.

So the last post that I put up was about how quickly, and easily the web allows people to connect around their passions…Add in some generosity, and you start to get some fascinating math

One Fat Cyclist

+2 of the most influential people in cycling

+2 social media tools

+48 hours

=$100,000+

Read on

Technorati Tags:
Cycling, Generosity, Lance Armstrong, Fatcyclist.com, Johann Bruyneel, Social Media

I have to admit, I didn’t get why there was a ‘Twitter’ until just recently, but the more I see things like this…the more it starts to make sense. I’ve always said that there’s a hunger for connection in this world, and while not terribly intimate, blogs/FB/twitter are connecting people around their passions, and things that are relevant to them….AND helping people.

Check out this fun example.

What seems like a hundred years ago…I raced bikes, and worked with a cycling coach.  We always worked on what are called intervals to make me a stronger rider.  Intervals are timed efforts followed by periods of rest.  Coach’s argument was that most athletes don’t really go hard enough when they think they’re going hard, and don’t go easy enough when they’re trying to go easy….leading to this ‘middle ground’ effort that doesn’t yield any improvement in fitness.

That’s so much like so many other areas of life.  If you really work hard for a time….you get to relax for a time.  If you go through the motions….you never really progress.

‘Middling’ a really easy trap to fall into.  I’ve spent the last few weeks there athletically.  (and coincidentally in other areas, too).

Here’s a prescription.  Go work hard.  Then relax however it makes sense for you.  I use meditation/relaxation exercises like these.

I met someone at a conference this last week, and this person asked about coaching.  “As I described what coaching is, (which I believe to be ‘Mentored Self Development’) and how it helps people grow….the lady said, “Could you talk to a bunch of people at my company…they need help.”

Without thinking, I said, “That’s not really how it works”….Usually, their boss calls me, and says something like, I’ve got a group of 2-3 really talented high potentials, and I want to progress them into larger roles in the company….but everyone hates them  (or they’re not organized…or they’re not…..)

Can you coach them to develop the skills they need so I can move them up?”

I told them that they probably wouldn’t be with the company if they didn’t develop the skills….

In this economy;  That’s motivated.

My acquaintance then asked “What makes someone want one?”

Nobody needs a coach.  You have to want one….or be made to want one by someone else…typically your boss.

There simply has to be a REASON to change.  …and with that reason comes the motivation.

Sometimes, it’s the perception of gain….but more often, it’s a fear of loss that motivates people to move.  I find that a LOT of coaching is helping people become conscious of what they’re losing.